It’s no secret that multilevel marketing companies have destroyed people’s relationships and left many in financial ruin. MLMs often employ cult-like tactics to recruit and motivate participants. They’ve even used coronavirus anxiety to exploit people in the midst of quarantine and rising unemployment.
Still, it seems like everyone has at least a few high school acquaintances hawking essential oils, dietary supplements or leggings on Facebook. Luckily, the funny folks of Twitter have found humor in the nightmare of what many describe as pyramid schemes.
Below, we’ve rounded up 45 funny and relatable tweets about multilevel marketing companies and pyramid schemes.
I wish any boy would treat me as nicely as the 13 girls in my insta dms trying to recruit me into a pyramid scheme
— Den (@daniellechezzy) February 7, 2019
i kno you dont want kids to miss a year of school cause they’ll fall behind but we never missed a year and my classmates still grew up to fall for pyramid schemes
— Dani Fernandez (@msdanifernandez) August 5, 2020
Who would like to come to my MLM party where I teach you how to avoid MLMs? It’s only $20, but free if you can get 6 of your friends to come.
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) January 30, 2018
The worst thing is flipping through Instagram stories and accidentally voting that you need more information from a pyramid scheme girl
— the limestone kid (@miraclestweets) May 28, 2019
If it’s true that your social life suffers after you become a parent, explain how just this week alone, I managed to score invitations to three online pyramid scheme sales parties.
— Lurkin’ Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) March 16, 2019
If you say I need to lose weight in the mirror three times, a high-school acquaintance appears and tries to rope you into their pyramid scheme.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) January 29, 2019
April Fools Day pranks are like Pyramid Schemes. You have to decide which of your friends you’re willing to lose over your “great idea”
— Eliza Bayne (@ElizaBayne) March 31, 2015
Are we sure the wise men who brought frankincense and myrrh weren’t just trying to sign Mary up for their essential oils pyramid scheme?
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) December 2, 2018
pyramid schemes: “hey girl I came across ur page & ur absolutely gorgeous! Would u be interested in trying our new weight loss plan? All you do is snort a couple lines of cocaine as a meal replacement & bam! ur down 30 pounds! 😍 let me know if ur interested girly 🥰”
— Hannah Brown (@HannahRaine19) April 11, 2019
I miss the days when the only pyramid schemes were for make-up and Tupperware, we could be like, “oh sorry, Debbie I don’t wear makeup” now we have to be like, “sorry I don’t want to buy a dildo from the church office administrator please put your pure romance catalog away.”
— Fossilized Tree Resin (@Jamberee13) March 2, 2019
i swore that by this valentine’s day i would know what a pyramid scheme is
— broti gupta (@BrotiGupta) February 14, 2018
I got a friend request from a girl I went to school with who sucked but I accepted it because I’m a masochist. Then she liked a bunch of my posts and I was like “maybe she’s cool now” because I’m a narcissist. Then she invited me to her pyramid scheme. Always trust your gut.
— Samantha Ruddy (@samlymatters) June 19, 2020
A girl selling Arbonne messaged me her number asking me to join her team & the next day a girl selling Monat did the same thing, so I gave her Arbonne girl’s number. Feel like I just opened a pyramid scheme black hole. A “hey girl! ✨” vortex
— kevo (@kevynnicolee) March 13, 2019
Don’t try your pyramid schemes on me Becky, the only essential oils I’m interested in are the ones that made these delicious boneless wings.
— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) April 30, 2019
Wrote every man in my fam a personalized Fathers day card to show my love and invite them to join my pyramid scheme.
— Luwanda (@LuwandaJenkins) June 16, 2019
Do I have a moral obligation to tell the girls I went to college with that their life-changing side hustle is a pyramid scheme?
— katie jo (@katiejoyofosho) July 25, 2019
MLM person on IG: I see you watched my Instagram stories and I just wanted–
Me: First off, they auto play. So don’t flatter yourself.#saveme
— Becky Too Many Kids, Send Help (@beckyhas4kids) September 30, 2018
im gonna start a pyramid scheme where i make one friend, they make two friends, those two each make three friends, and then i have a birthday party
— jolie fka EMO SLUT (@princess_labia) December 27, 2018
Are Girl Scout cookies a pyramid scheme
— Brittani Nichols (@BisHilarious) February 17, 2015
Planning a super scary Halloween costume as a mom selling every pyramid scheme product. A trench coat full of oils, shakes, & nail stickers.
— Ally (@TragicAllyHere) October 12, 2016
I secretly like listening to people in pyramid schemes explain their products cause they be lying they ASSES off 😭😭😭
— folake aina (@f0lake) July 15, 2020
no one from my high school has tried to involve me in a pyramid scheme which is a Testament to how bad our math program was
— Jennifer McAuliffe (@JenniferJokes) March 20, 2019
A panic alarm but for when someone is trying to rope me into a pyramid scheme.
— Possum Kingdom 🖤 (@aissalanis) January 18, 2019
feel like we could get full mask buy-in from the anti-vaxx facebook moms if someone just took one for the team and started a mask MLM
— Amanda Mull (@amandamull) July 21, 2020
Pharaoh: Let’s build giant tetrahedrons out of rock!
Ancient Egyptians: Woohoo yeah!
Pyramid scheme guy: I have a better idea.
— Phil (@geowizzacist) July 31, 2017
Shout out to the old friends from high school trying to leverage a global pandemic quarantine to drive sales in their Facebook pyramid scheme.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 25, 2020
How is sharing different from a pyramid scheme.
— Bunmi Laditan (@HonestToddler) June 18, 2013
I would go to sleep, but then how will I learn to be sucked into a real estate pyramid scheme via infomercial?
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) July 29, 2016
Old friends I haven’t heard from for a while are great! They ask for help moving or try selling me a pyramid scheme. Good to hear from you!
— Abe Yospe (@Cheeseboy22) November 5, 2015
every girl who had a two piece prom dress is in a pyramid scheme now
— s*d (@06fordexplorer) June 24, 2020
I wana start a pyramid scheme but instead of protein shakes it’s my emotional trauma
— Noel Miller (@thenoelmiller) August 17, 2019
Multi Level Marketing? I think you’re confused. MLM stands for “Make Lotsa Money!” Haha well anyway, while you’re here, would you happen to feel like buying $30,000 worth of Crustacian Shears and Ballerina Powder? I’m in a lot of trouble.
— Max Dylan Ash (@mynameisntdave) August 1, 2020
If at first you don’t succeed, try Pyramid Schemes apparently
— Eliza Bayne (@ElizaBayne) May 8, 2014
People from HS join a pyramid scheme and put “entrepreneur” in their bios lmaooo
— blm (@AlexaParraM) December 12, 2018
We really gave lana too much room with that normcore aesthetic, out here dating a cop like her next album will come with Rodan+Fields instead of merch
— folu (@notfolu) December 17, 2019
Kids: (pointing) What is that?
Me: Oh, just a clown in the sewer.
Clown: ᵂᵒᵘˡᵈ ʸᵒᵘ ˡᶦᵏᵉ ᵗᵒ ʲᵒᶦⁿ ᵐʸ ³⁰⁻ᵈᵃʸ ᶠᶦᵗⁿᵉˢˢ ᶜʰᵃˡˡᵉⁿᵍᵉ ᵍʳᵒᵘᵖ?
Me: RUN, KIDS, IT’S A PYRAMID SCHEME!!
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) January 16, 2019
My friend got a degree in egyptology, but can’t get a job, So he’s paying more money to get a Phd, so he can work teaching other people egyptology. In his case college is literally a pyramid scheme.
— Katie Hannigan (@katiehannigan) August 30, 2019
Kelly Rowland has me wanting to get into Fabletics and I really thought it was a matcha smoothie white lady pyramid scheme
— Bolu Babalola (@BeeBabs) September 25, 2019
Don’t Tell Mom She Bought Into a Pyramid Scheme Again
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) March 25, 2017
I really only go on Facebook for work and to see the latest pyramid scheme someone I went to high school with is now deeply invested in
— Jenna Amatulli (@ohheyjenna) April 11, 2018
MLM salespeople: Who needs 50% off magic body slimming wraps?!
Me: What I need is 50% off my cellphone bill, Sarah.
— Ｍｏｍｚｉｌｌａ (@milliondollrfam) June 24, 2019
The Venn diagram of white women concerned with looting and the white women engaged in Pyramid schemes and MLMs is a circle…
— Crutches&Spice ♿️ : Rude For A Disabled Person (@Imani_Barbarin) June 3, 2020
Phone scams that change their number to look like yours are operating on the false belief that I won’t think a number from my hometown is scamming me when in reality every girl from my high school is now involved in a pyramid scheme.
— Samantha Ruddy (@samlymatters) September 10, 2019
A pyramid scheme but the base isn’t very wide, it’s more narrow, in fact its more like a skyscraper scheme
— Dave (@pittdave13) May 18, 2020
Got another invite to an MLM night disguised as a “fun girls’ nite”. If anyone wonders why I set my computer on fire, now they’ll know why.
— Christina Evans (@cakevans) April 21, 2017
MLMs Are A Nightmare For Women And Everyone They Know
How MLMs And Cults Use The Same Mind Control Techniques
10 Horror Stories That Prove MLM Companies Are Complete Trash
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This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.